Asphalt Shaking
As you probably know, we had a “moderate” earthquake in Los Angeles today. The epicenter was located 30 miles east of LA in Chino Hills. Here is the email that I sent to my family, who were obviously freaking, especially when I could not be reached on my celly.
It was pretty crazy. We’re still waiting out the aftershocks so we’ll see how the rest of the day goes, but it seems like the worst is over with no injuries or significant damage. This was my second earthquake, actually. The first one was much smaller, but it was the jerking kind so it felt scarier. This one was a rolling earthquake and it didn’t register at first that it even WAS an earthquake. I was waiting in line to order some lunch so of course, I was looking down texting. I started swaying back and forth and felt like I was losing my balance. I was starving so I thought I was dizzy or something and felt like I needed to sit down. Nobody seemed to be freaking out. A minute later someone texted me EARTHQUAKE!!! Then it dawned on me. I haven’t had cell service since because all the providers are jammed.
It occurs to me now that today was one of the most peaceful days I have had in a long time because after the quake I drove back home to use my land line and took my sweet time getting back to work. It was like the west coast equivalent of a snow day from school.
One of the things that I did to waste time today after I decided to not work was cruise around my Google Analytics thingy (thanks schmidley!) and check out the weirdos that are checking out my blog. For those of you who don’t know what Google Analytics is, and I barely do, it’s a tool for quantifying traffic on your website. I just use it to see how many hits per day I get on my blog and where the traffic is coming from (i can’t see email or IP addresses so if you’re stalking me, have no fear. i can’t see the 50-100 hits per week originating from your specific location) but my favorite thing to check out is the keywords that people type into search engines that lead them to my blog. Here are some of the recent winners:
joe jonas ass (explains itself)
charles manson left handed (i need to meet this person)
reklam alany (?)
kay hanley nude (sorry kids, i’m catholic. not remotely findable. unless…)
kay hanley alcoholic (i dunno. i was probably drunk)
o quo tangin wann (oh yeah, that guy. he’s with reklam alany last i heard. and they’re IN MY ATTIC!!!)
Also, lots of really disgusting shit about Miley of course, which I will not repeat for obvious reasons. Several requests for naked pictures of pretty much all the gals on the HM/MC tour. If search engines are the arbiter of truth about the interwebs, then we are all living amongst very, shall we say, singularly focused people. Or I could just say you are all big pervs.
I also spent a bit of time today on youtube finding videos of songs that I loved in my youth. This may or may not cause you to think less of me, but I loved really crappy music in my day. I don’t even know why I am using past tense here because I still love me some crappy music. I like to balance out my otherwise impeccable taste in everything else. Yeah, punk? You wanna say somethin’? Psssshht….
Here’s one of many favorites from back when I had humongous hair and dated jocks that smelled like Polo Cologne. That smell (which is rare to come across these days) still makes me a bit weak in the knees as memories of nervously slow dancing to Open Arms swirl hazily through my brain, but that’s another topic. Other immediate thoughts: Whatever happened to Marilyn McCoo? Also, didn’t Lisa Lisa have huge boobs?
xok
July 29th, 2008 at 6:53 pm
See I Knew you secretly loved jocks. An I swear I never searched Kay Hanley Nude in GOOGLE.
July 29th, 2008 at 7:55 pm
OK, I can admit that I pretty much did come here for the Joe Jonas ass in some sense, at first (via Greg G. before he shuttered), but, Kay, I DO love your blog, and YOU, even without it. Keep up the good work!
July 29th, 2008 at 8:29 pm
Kay, speaking of which, I’m curious, who is the song Video about? Be honest.
July 29th, 2008 at 11:26 pm
I was definitely in high school back in the Solid Gold days. Into Journey, Polo, etc.
When this song came out I was in a transition from Journey/Ozzy/Crue to Zep/REM/Prince/INXS/Psychedelic Furs/classic rock at the time. Inexplicably my friends and I embarrassingly loved this song. Had no idea it was Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam until you mentioned it.
The original video is also on YouTube at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=16shEIbNVmo.
July 29th, 2008 at 11:28 pm
Whooops. Correction… this song isn’t Lisa Lisa with the “Cult Jam,” but instead with “Full Force.” Like it really matters.
July 29th, 2008 at 11:53 pm
Don’t know about analytics Kay, but I check u daily. I added that feedjit thingy to my blog to see who is reading it - unlike you - mine blog is not even promoted anywhere and I have no fans, so it’s just word of mouth thing, friends telling friends. I thought, great! But I noticed some sick puppy is reading my blog FROM THE MIDDLE OF A HEAVILY WOODED AREA in Virginia!! I figured, either the Lochness monster moved to Virginia and has a crush on me, or it’s an alien, which would be really cool, or some underground spy, which is spooky…who knows if all the ex-commies are being watched. Damn, I’m so paranoid! But yeah, I was VERY scared to blog, and YOU made it seem so fun, plus I can avoid a ton of ‘wassup’ e-mails to all my friends, but now hermits?
PS: you know that small little itty bitty earthquake in 2005, where was that like Chatsworth? I packed all my things into a suitcase and spent the rest of the day with Maya in the car, ready to head home to CT!! Glad you’re okay. Those things are a mutha!
July 30th, 2008 at 1:13 am
“My tears will burn the pillow.” Wow.
And who’s Bowlegged Lou?
July 30th, 2008 at 8:03 am
I looooved Lisa Lisa! Not her huge boobs, but her voice and her songs–she ruled.
July 30th, 2008 at 10:45 am
that’s awesome. because when i want to be nostalgic and remember high school and middle school i end up youtubing YOUR videos. sigh. generations.
glad the earthquake left you unharmed.
July 30th, 2008 at 10:50 am
i’ve got playlists on imeem and some serious youtube searches that include songs i loved when i was younger. “piano in the dark” by brenda russell? you’re goddamn right i can feel your emotion!
remember when allure and 112 covered this song in the late ’90s? it wasn’t a bad cover. had more bitch than lisa lisa would’ve ever been able to give the song, but still a cover.
i’ve actually begun finding old tv shows i watched on youtube too. it’s awfully entertaining.
and i thought you got me, but i search for KEVIN jonas ass, not joe.
July 30th, 2008 at 2:55 pm
Just so you know, I was never a Polo man, though I will admit to having experimented briefly with Stetson and Drakkar Noir. The Stetson was a gift from my aunt but I actually bought the Drakkar in Paris myself when I was 16. The girlfriends I had at the time didn’t seem to mind. I think I also had a cologne called Tuscany for a while. Cologne was popular in the late 80’s / early 90’s.
I haven’t worn cologne since I was 20, though.
July 30th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
christobal - you went all the way to paris to buy drakkar?? was CVS not around yet??
July 30th, 2008 at 4:45 pm
i saw lisa lisa & cult jam with full force play at uncle sam’s at nantasket beach the night before the patriots lost in the super bowl to da bears. oddly, the show was sponsored by wbcn. i remember having a conversation with bradley j about edie sedgwick.
yeah, that weekend pretty much sucked.
July 30th, 2008 at 6:54 pm
I am purposely going to search fucked up things in google to get to your blog.
Happy creeping!
July 30th, 2008 at 11:36 pm
HOLY SHIT!!! Lisa Lisa is actually way worse than I remembered. I have to say I’m shocked- no disrespect to LaLa and littlerosa.
July 31st, 2008 at 3:33 pm
Kay,
Lisa Lisa was on one of the One-hit wonder perspective on VH1 a year ago, unfortunately, she didn’t age that well.
I still remember when you did an interview on ET when “Here and Now” was climbing the charts, something about how it was being used on a TV show and how you didn’t want it to have the same fate as the Friends theme song. (Was it Melrose Place or Party of Five?). Saw you live with the BOBW tour here in Portland. Yes, you’re still hot!
August 1st, 2008 at 6:43 am
Dana and I sold Lisa Lisa a couple of pairs of boots when we worked at Wild Pair at the South Shore Plaza. She did have some serious bombs, but she was tiny and wore the 6-inch heels. We wondered how the hell she kept her balance in those things because she was so top-heavy.
By the way, remember to tune in to Kiss 108 on Saturday at noon to hear “Wishing on a Star.”
August 3rd, 2008 at 6:00 am
Ok, ok
I worked very hard not to have any bad tracks behind me.
I think I put in Kay Cougar 1000 times into the google search machine!
I’m to far away to stalk you, or mike
I’ll stalk Robin Young some more !
~NiteOwl~
August 3rd, 2008 at 6:18 pm
OMG!!! That song sux! Lost in Emotion is better… Makes me wanna hang out at the roller rink! LOL.
August 6th, 2008 at 1:01 pm
how about expose’ “baby never look good in blue” or “never get over you getting over me?” oh the teenage tears!
August 6th, 2008 at 9:09 pm
How funny that someone’s “charles manson left handed” search led to your site! If memory serves, a search for my favorite ‘70s songwriter pulled up your witty blog and I was hooked. Thanks for sharing some of your fascinating life with the rest of us. (Love Weaponize, by the way.)