Kay Hanley

Everyone is up my ass about “Where are the birthday party pictures?” and “Did you put in an order for that walker yet?  Har har.” and “Why can’t you just post the party pictures on your blog already?  Is it because you are suffering from macular degeneration and dementia because you’re like, really old?”

Look, I’ve been busy, ok? Also, I didn’t FEEL like it and we all know how I don’t like doing things that I don’t want to do.  

michelle lights the candles.  so many candles.  look at her laughing.

my friends understand me 

 usa proposes a toast as i gesticulate

stacy, bill’s arms, scotty. 

gary & janet

me and jess get ready for the party at chez rocker 

 justine & alexandra

kristen, kaylyn & gary 

mario & me. 

nina & dave 

jamie, sara & paul 

me & kristen 

 jaco & vashon are badasses

 linda, me and joey

 kaylyn, fannius & shea.

 mish & pinky

 It was an amazing party, needless to say.  There were so many people in that room that I genuinely love, it was a bit overwhelming.  Thank you, sexy people.  You made me the happiest girl in the whole wide world.

xok 

As the summer draws to a close I would simply like to say that it’s about time.  We have officially run out of things to do with Zoe & Henry.  I am exhausted and possibly in need of a liver transplant from the endless bbqs and pool parties.  I am leaping for joy that school starts on Wednesday so I can resume my more regimented and only somewhat excessive life.   

I would be remiss if I did not mention, however, that we have had such a blast this year and I can’t help but reflect on my charmed fate since relocating to Los Angeles. One of the biggest reasons for this is due to the friendships that I have developed since I’ve been here.  Over the last 5 years I have made the best girlfriends that I’ve ever had and I am regularly awed by what they bring to my life, both in silliness and seriousness.  It’s like being in high school all over again but without the torment and and crushing insecurity.  It’s like Bizarro World high school!

Carol decided to hold Isabel and Kate’s birthday party in a limo the other day, because that’s how we do.  We all screamed along to the new Jonas Brothers and Miley CDs and popped into Robano’s in Toluca Lake for an awesome pizza party.   What could be more funner than spending the afternoon with my MILFAS and their girlies?

world’s greatest moms 

happy birthday kj & miz iz! 

 One morning last week, I groggily poured myself a cup of coffee and sat down in front of my computer to begin my day as I always do with a cruise around Huffington Post.  One of the top headlines was something about “Fourth American Idol Judge. Meet Kara!” along with a picture of my good friend Kara DioGuardi.  Ummm…WHAT???!!

I have already created a position for myself as Kara’s Personal Assistant In Matters Only Relating To American Idol (KPAIMORTAI) and I am hopeful that I will be able to begin my new job as soon as I can force Kara to understand how necessary such a position is in her new career.  I mean, who’s gonna announce her a arrival to the set each day by tossing rose petals under her feet and conducting the horns?  That helicopter is not gonna fly itself, either.  And whom, if not I, is going to instruct the riff raff to not address unless addressed nor make direct eye contact with America’s new household name?  There is only one person to meet these challenges and that person is me.

Kara’s sexy man, Mike threw her an impromptu party last night to celebrate her return from the first round of auditions.  Again, more of my favorite girly-os were on hand to toast Ms. Thing.

 me, mish, kara, janet

 We’re heading over to Brian & Cindy Malouf’s house for the final BBQ of the summer and a fitting start to the new school year.

xok 

The other day we went over to Michelle’s house.  Duh, what else is new?  I’ll tell you what’s new, smarty pants - Lisa Loeb has an utterly charming kids record out called Camp Lisa and she was shooting a music video in Michelle’s back yard.   Zoemay and I sang on a few songs so Z was thrilled to be invited to jump around with Lisa for the video shoot.  

awwww….. 

Z is holding a Daisy Rock guitar, btw.  I LOVE these guitars and I finally got to meet the owner of the company after 5 years of working together on various projects, not the least of which was her creating 5 different Care Bears guitars for the We Are The Care Bears video.  Thanks Tish, it was great to finally meet you in person.

The video was directed by Gary and shot by Kaylyn.  At the end of a very long day,  Z got  a lift home in Kaylyn’s bitchin’ convertible Mini Cooper.  I am so jealous of this car.

whatchu lookin’ at punk? 

Other stuff & things:

• Check out Jessie Malakouti’s myspace page and listen to #1 Big Booty, a song that she and I wrote with Wayne Rodrigues for Jessie’s upcoming solo debut.
• Michelle and I sat down with Scott Austin and filmed an interview for his new web broadcast, :90 Music Show w/ Scott Austin.

 I’m in Provo, Utah today for a huge 4th of July concert featuring Ms. Thing as the headliner.  Then it’s off to Cape Cod where I will collapse on Mommy & Daddy’s hammock and cry for a week demand that people bring me things like lobsters, my phone, a hot dog, a blanket and another blanket because it will be cold at night.  I’ll probably need a pillow while you’re up.  Thank you.   No, you can’t use the hammock because I will be on it for the rest of the week.  Go away now, but first will you bring me that sunscreen?  Ok, I think I have everything now.  Check in later because I may think of other things that I want and/or need.  

Yup.  That’s the plan.

-xok 

USA Mike has been in the studio producing an album for the lovely Lauren for the past week and a half so I have cut back my work schedule to take on some serious mommy duty.  Honestly, I don’t know how stay-at-home moms do this job 7 days a week.  It’s really exhausting.  The nice part, aside from spending rare daytime hours with the kiddos, is that I’ve been doing a lot of cooking and entertaining at home.                 

Jack had a few weeks off from the Jonas Brothers tour so he and Ashlee, one of my favorite ladies from the Miley tour, came over last Friday for dinner.  It was great to catch up with them and get all of the latest news of their lives.  Ash is putting in some major time with her drum lessons and Jack is about to embark on a hugely ambitious year with the JoBros.  Henry and Z are always over the moon to hang out with cool people that they met on tour.

jack, ashlee & z 

ash & z with the lushis-mobile                 

 Over the weekend, we had our somewhat regular Sunday pool party bbq.  During the summer months (when we aren’t in boston) we try to get as many people as possible over to our house on the weekends to swim, eat and drink.  The last variable of that equation usually has me feeling like shit on Monday morning, but it’s always worth it.

luke, kate & henry 

luke & isabel 

 omg, it’s milo & jackson!!!

Last week, I went to the 40th birthday party of one of my best girlfriends, Kaylyn Thornal.   At some point during our 15 year friendship, I became a soccer mom and she became a hot lesbian director.  It’s as if that song “Ebony & Ivory” was written just for us, but instead of a song about blacks and whites, it’s breeders and dykes.  I’m not sure who’s Stevie Wonder and who’s Paul McCartney in this relationship but I love her a lot and she, me.

mish, kaylyn, fan & kristen 

me & my besties.

Michael & I just bought a painting  by the artist Tim Bavington.  As always, the brilliant Naomi was the person who introduced this beautiful piece of art into our lives but I have to be honest:  I am terrified now that I have this thing in my house.   If Henry throws one of his Indiana Jones daggers in the wrong direction, we will be screwed to the tune of a new car and then I will be forced to administer a near fatal beating to my own flesh and blood.  Trust me when I say that I can think of a dozen similar scenarios between my children and this painting that might reasonably result in me resorting to some kind of violence, and that’s kind of scary.  Hey, beauty is truth. Sometimes brutally so.  Check out our awesome new painting!

naomi & the bavington   

 For those of you who have asked for my opinion on the Miley Cyrus maelstrom, here is my answer.  

 i don’t care. nor should you.

Solidarity,

Kay 

Due to the nature of my work, I have acquaintances from all over the world and from all sorts of backgrounds.  Some of the people that I know start out as Cleo fans or posters on my message board and then somehow they just become part of my life.   A few weeks back, one of the KH message board peeps sent me an email saying that he and his wife were coming to LA from Chicago to hang out, so despite having never met in person, we made plans to have lunch.  It’s funny how in this day and age, when we do so much of our communicating over the web, that you can meet someone for the first time and connect as if you already know each other because you DO know each other from sharing similar virtual interests, sometimes for years.  It’s a strange kind of vetting process, isn’t it?

Adi and Shayna showed up at 11:45am.  I showed them around our house and then brought them out back to check out our recording studio and introduce them to USA Mike, who never leaves the damn place, and then we strolled over to Mexicali on Ventura for some people watching and grub. It was a gorgeous afternoon even by LA standards so we chose a table outside and caught up on what has been happening with all of us; their years in Israel before they were a couple, my cockamamie schemes, real estate in Los Angeles, blah, blah.  Because Adi and Shayna are newlyweds, the conversation about how they met and got married came up quickly.

• • adi:   “it was kind of a saga.”
  • me:   “the best stories always are.”
  • shayna:   “does she know?”
  • adi:  “no.”
  • me: “what are you talking about?”
  • shayna:   “i was shot in the chest during a terrorist attack in israel.”
  • me:   “……….” 

 Hands down, they are the all time winners of the “how we met” contest with their star-crossed, globe-trotting, death-defying tale of love ignored, found, lost and then found again.   The tale also reminds me that even one life lost to violence and war diminishes all of our lives.   The innocent woman blown up by a god driven terrorist in Kabul, Jerusalem, Karachi, New York, Mosul, Yemen, London or Mogadishu is surely someone’s daughter, sister or mother, but she may also be your future wife and mother to the children you hope to have someday.

 That was the the most fascinating lunch conversation I’ve ever had guys, and I thank you for sharing the story with me.

  shayna & adi     

After I parted ways with my fabulous lunch companions I had to get back to the house and take care of a bunch of stuff and then get ready for sound check at the Henry Fonda Theatre.  Michelle had been asked by our friend David Gray at Island Records to put together groups of backup singers for an Aussie superstar by the name of Delta Goodrem who was performing industry showcases in NY and LA.  Since I am totally a profesh backup singer now, Mish roped me into generously offered me a job on her LA team.   It was actually a lot of fun.  The other singers, Nadia and Brandon (stacy lynes, i’ll give you one guess where you know brandon from) are ridiculously good, as is Michelle, so I’m sure nobody noticed when I stopped singing at a critical moment at the end of the very spare piano/vocal song because I started choking.  Literally AND figuratively.   Sorry about that, Delta.  At least we know it will never happen again. 

 On that note, I’m deciding that being a professional backup singer kind of sucks.  I’ve only ever done the backup gig with Miley and I LOVE that job so I assumed that you get always treated a certain way.  Even though Delta was super pro and respectful, I had this weird “faceless employee” feeling all night that made me think that the backup singer career has the potential to be a little dehumanizing.   No matter, even at its crappiest, any career where you get to sing or play music all the time beats punching a clock.  

we will not work under these conditions!!  unless you pay us. 

 xok  

I just got home from the Knitting Factory where Michelle and I went to see a band called Haim that we are absolutely in love with. They are 3 sisters in their teens from the Val (holla!), write weird, amazing pop songs and can play their asses off. Mish and I left with a new sense of hope that the next generation of bands might not be lost to the cult of posing and selling out after all. 

After the show, Mish and I stood out on Hollywood Blvd. in front of the club talking shop for about 20 minutes before we finally realized that our kids were asleep for the night and that we could actually stay out if we wanted to. With great vigor and vim, we skipped across the street to the Roosevelt for a drink and somehow managed to avoid the papparazzi who sneakily pretended to not notice us. Hint: if you ever find yourself in that part of Hollywood, don’t be afraid of the Roosevelt. Even though you have every reason in the world to loathe the vapid, disgusting, cultural and moral bottom feeding that the owners have chosen as their “re-branding” mission, you will be pleasantly surprised as long as you avoid the mucky muck. Go directly through the front doors and find Dakota, which is the steakhouse there. It’s really comfortable and chill and the staff happily sidesteps the douchebaggery usually associated with the Roosevelt.    

We started rehearsals today for the Hannah/Miley gig at the Houston Rodeo, which takes place this weekend. Highlight from today’s rehearsal? Singing backup vox on Achy Breaky Heart and I Want My Mullet Back with Billy Ray Cyrus.

My favorite verbal exchange??

candice: “i cant wait! i haven’t been to a rodeo in sooo long!!”

me: “…….” 

I’ll post new pictures and stories as soon as possible, but right now I must sleep.  I will leave you with a picture of me and Angie C (now shaw) whom you Boston people may know from the ‘FNX days. Angie and her sweet little family just moved to LA (redondo beach, actually) but we haven’t been able to coordinate and hang out. That is, until the MIGHTY MIGHTY BOSsTONES SHOW LAST WEEKEND!!!!! We had a blast. I really wanted to see The Streetdogs, but sadly, I missed them. The Bosstones made me and Angie feel like we were at the Rat in 1991 again. Thanks Joe the Kid for the list action and also for being a sweetie.    

last hurrah uh-huh, do it again!!

 xok

We are less than 2 weeks away from the end of the Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus Best Of Both Worlds Tour. It seems unreal that just a few months ago I was wondering how on earth I would acclimate to such an unfamiliar working environment. I couldn’t imagine leaving my husband, my children, my friends, my work. At this point, the tour has become such a huge part of my life that I can’t imagine ever having done anything else. With that said, I can”t wait to go back to all the stuff I left in Los Angeles

Speaking of LA, I got to go back there for the 48 hours preceding our 3 night run in Vegas. Michael, Z and I went to the premier of the Hannah Montana 3D movie extravaganza, which I am in. Zoe likes to remind me that this was her second red carpet event* and only my first. I think that means we need to move back to Boston.

cute.

I got an awesome shot of Miley’s manager Jason. He seemed pretty happy about the way things were going.

well done, mate.

I ran into Miley’s big sis Brandi along with little sis Noah and Grammy, all of whom have been on the road with us at various times. Brandi performs with us whenever Billy Ray joins us onstage for “Ready, Set, Don’t Go”. That Cyrus family is quite lovely.

yay! we’re in a movie!

While I was home, I also got to hang out with my handsome boyfriend, Jackson Petty. His mother, Michelle, tried to distract me from the cuteness by talking about the music business, the future of our company, blah blah blah…. I’m sorry - I was NOT having it.

jack & dan

i am delicious

Actually, I WAS having it the day before when we took our new Art Is War artist, Countre Black, to meet and have lunch with David Gray from Island/Def Jam. Not for nothing, this occasion also marked my first decent meal in months. Thanks David!

so civilized

A few sidenotes:

My friend Jonny Mead & I scored our first #1 record (on the Latin Hot 100) with a song we wrote for a Latin group called RBD. The song is called Extrana Sensacion, although it wasn’t called that when we wrote it. Yay for us!

Mike Schmid posted a bit on his blog about my fainting spell in Vegas and it caused an uproar amongst my loved ones as well as complete strangers. I had no idea how many of my friends were reading his blog - way to go Schmid! On that subject, I can assure you that I am fine. I had not eaten dinner, my blood sugar dropped and I fainted. It will never happen again, promise. My only complaint is that nobody took any photos. Surely Candice and Mike knew how totally blogworthy those would have been. Meh.

Currently in Glendale, AZ. For the second time in both 3 months and my entire life.

xok

* scroll down to the picture of ed begley jr. with his daughter hayden and her friend zoemay (!)