Kay Hanley

This weekend was strange because we had 3 days off. Jamie, Jaco, Vashon and Stacy went back to LA to shoot Miley’s video so Candice, Mike and I held it down for the trek through Florida. Our road manager Jack and ticket mistress Gabi hopped on our bus and we were treated to management style partying. Again, nothing but hot cocoa and quiet reading. Yesiree.

Friday night found us in Talahassee for a stopover while the drivers got some rest. Jack decided that Barnicle Bill’s was the plae to go so Gabi, Candice, Jack and I hopped in a cab and were treated to one of the best seafood shacks I have ever been to. Now this picture is one of those things that makes my heart practically explode with happiness. Check this shit out:

We sat at a long counter and ordered yummy ale and literally hundreds of oysters. The guy just kept shucking them and we kept eating them.

This was our happy crew.

The next day we drove to Tampa Bay for another 2 days off before our Tampa show. I was now beginning to deeply regret not going home to LA for the weekend. Thank goodness for Gabi and Mike who totally entertained me. We hung out next door to our hotel and took in the lovely view of the bay and drank some drinks.

I will pretend that the evening ended with that civilized photograph, but alas it did not. Luckily, there is no photographic evidence of the carnage that ensued.

Sunday was sleepytime. I slept and slept in my beautiful hotel room overlooking Tampa Bay and dreamt of home.

Tomorrow is the last Miley show before Thanksgiving and then I’ll be flying to NY for the Macy’s Parade. I can’t wait to see my babies, who are flying from LA with Michael to meet me there. In case you are unfamiliar with my strange life, I am riding on the Care Bears float “singing” one of the songs that Michael and I wrote and produced for the Care Bears movie. I hear it will be raining this year.

The Jonas Brothers are going to the Macy’s Parade as well but I haven’t been able to find the opportunity to engage them on the subject, really. I think they have a lot on their minds.

xok

The show last night was so-so, but our stay in Dallas was excellent. During the concert, I was really distracted because Troy Aikman was rocking out right in front of me in the 3rd row. And when I say rocking out I mean standing around looking AWESOME. I do not have a picture of that but take my word for it - he is um…distracting. And when I say distracting I mean… oh nevermind.

Stella and Atom met me for lunch at the hotel and we had a lovely time catching up. Atom and I exchanged copies of our new albums and I am planning on blasting some new Feable Weiner tout de suite. That means like, soon or something. Stella’s band Cruiserweight still doesn’t have a release date for their incredible new record, which pisses me off but I’m sure a commitment from their label is forthcoming. Quickly.

indie rock’s premier couple: atom & stella

Everyone in the band has been feeling pretty crappy since the beginning of the tour. I started the tour on antibiotics for a sinus infection and have since added a steroid inhaler and albuterol for bronchitis, but I still can’t seem to shake the baseline yuckiness. Wait, is that too much information? Anyhow, our fantastical road manager Jack ordered a doctor for us so that we could get another round of B12 shots. Jamie opted for a shot in the arm but Candice, Mike and I dropped trou faster than you can say miracle drug

I didn’t take a picture of Mike getting a B12 shot in his ass, but that’s probably for the best.

Apropos of nothing, my cashier at the pharmacy where I got my new antibiotics was named Tyra Banks. Oh, how I laughed. I may never stop laughing.

tyra banks

So now we are rolling to sexy Bossier City, La. Goodbye Dallas!

xok

I have no idea how I got so out of the swing of things with my blog all of a sudden but I’m going to do my best to catch up in a hurry because I have to spend the usual 90 minutes putting on my eyelashes and I’m running a bit behind.

Let’s start with Phoenix! Killer crowd and I got to see my best friend Naomi and her family, who drove from Vegas to hang out and see the show. Izzy was especially startstruck by the Jonas Brothers and Hillary documented the whole experience with her cellphone. I want to see that footage, Hil!

roger, eric, naomi, hillary, izzy

Later that evening I was thrilled to find out that we were finally staying in the same hotel as the crew so I jumped at the opportunity to hang out with them, which I never get to do. We had some hot cocoa and then we all read each other our favorite examples of Shakespeare’s iambic pentameter. Wrapped things up with some microwave popcorn and I was in bed asleep by 11:30. That’s how I remember it. Yup.

the hardest working people in showbiz

Then we got on the bus, played a show, did a bunch of stuff, maybe played another show and then had a day off in one of my favorite places in the world: Dallas, Texas. The guys went golfing so Candice and I hopped in a cab for a masive mall to do some major shopping. Now, if you knew me, you would be aware that i HATE shopping but Candice is a total pro so I felt that it would be stupid to not tag along. The day began auspiciously:

It was a lovely day off. Thanks for showing me a good time, Candy-o.

More on Dallas later - I gotta go do my thing.

xok

Oh, it was all so easy before; back in the olden times of 3 weeks ago when we were just starting out. Way back then, I knew that if I forgot my favorite jammies, eye cream, Arrested Development dvd, various unmentionables, etc., I’d be back home in Los Angeles to collect said items and then get a second chance, even. Not anymore. I don’t even think there are like, stores or currency once we get into the middle of this thing. I am so screwed.

Staples Center. Awesome. So many reasons. So few words. But you know me - I’ll do my best. Michael decided to take Henry out for a boys night and avoid the madness, which freed Zoemay to go with her girlfriends and gave me the chance for one last hurrah with my MILFy homegirls from the ‘hood *ahem, the val*. Carol supplied the tickets, I supplied the backstage passes, Courtney supplied the ruthlessly sarcastic wit and the girlie-os supplied the cuteness. If you put a gun to my head and forced me to pick just one reason for me to have taken this job it would be:

miley, isabel, zoemay, kate

Then we all went back to the tour bus to ride back to Studio City and say goodbye. I miss you already.

the rockers, the soccers and the von halens. hollaaa!!!

I dropped Hank off at school for the last time at 8:45am while Z got to sleep in because we got back so late. Michael and I dropped her off at school around 10:30am and expected to get the stinkeye from her teacher. Ms. C was very understanding, thank heavens. I think I might have fallen apart completely if I had to say goodbye to Z under any sort of harshness. As it was, I could barely let her go and only left the classroom because I was about to cry in front of a bunch of 3rd graders.

Yesterday was San Diego. After the pandemonium of the LA show, SD was a bit of a let down. Sorry San Diego Sports Arena, it’s not you, it’s me. The exciting thing for me about yesterday was hooking up with Fan and Kristen from Shut Up Stella after the show. I loved every single second that I got to spend with them. Some things just don’t change.

And now I am here in Phoenix after having slept half the night on the couch in the front lounge of the bus. I have to stop doing that. Naomi and her family are coming tonight so it should be another awesome hang.

xok

I’m on my way to the Staples Center for our big show. Well, it’s a big show for me because Zoe Mabel is coming with her friends Kate & Isabel along with my friends Carol and Courtney. I don’t know why I’m so nervous but my stomach is in knots.

We had a lovely day off yesterday into today. I managed to see some of my favorite people, however briefly for some very efficient catching up. Michelle and I are trying to run our production company in my absence so it was fabulous that I was able to make it home for the Art Is War quarterly shareholders meeting.

Jessie came over yesterday to re-cut a vocal on something she wrote with Michael and me a few years ago that she wants to start pitching. I was so happy to see her and so was Z, as you can see.

What last 30 minutes in Los Angeles would be complete without a power lunch with Conroy and USA Mike? The conversation was dominated by what else? The writers strike. We are on Team Writers, but I think that’s fairly obvious.

So, yeah. Staples Center. Wow, even I’m impressed. And scared. I could easily throw up, I think but I won’t because the dancers were nice enough to let Mike, Vashon & me hitch a ride on their bus. Thanks Mandy & Ashlee!!

xok

Whew. I have some catching up to do.

Last night’s show in Fresno was hands down the best in my opinion. The audience had their s*%t together and everyone on stage seemed pretty stoked about that. It didn’t hurt that Miley was acting like a crazy person, and I mean that as very high praise. I don’t have any pictures from yesterday but if I did, I would probably choose the ones that I did not take of Kevin Jonas’ disco birthday party on their tour bus after the show. I’m a knucklehead.

The night before was San Jose. It was a matinee show so we made dinner reservations for the whole band at Arcadia, Chef Michael Mina’s lovely restaurant. Somehow, Jamie had made his acquaintance recently so when we got there we discovered that Chef had prepared a 9 course price fixe tasting menu for us. Wow. The food, wine, service was excellent. The only bummer was our one missing bandmate , who was not feeling well. It gave us ample opportunity to talk smack about him though, so that was fun. Of course, I kid. We love you, Mike. Here we are, living large.

stacy, jason, me, jamie, candice, vashon and jaco.

So then it was back to the hotel for a nightcap. There was some kind of Apple convention going on so the bar was pretty rocking by the time we got back. Those Silicon Valley dork moguls really like to have conventions and get their drink on, I have noticed. One of them was playing piano and that RULED because we happened to be in the mood for a sing along. Nothing like trying to figure out the words to “Yellow Brick Road” when the pressure’s on. I consider our overall group performance a failure, but I blame the piano player because he was not very good. Nor should he have been, I’m just saying.

I can’t remember what Vashon was saying at this moment but I like to think it was something along the lines of: “Just keep playing ‘Don’t Stop Believing’ and ‘Piano Man’ on loop and we won’t have any problems, mate. Also, give blondie here that pomegranate-tini-rita you just ordered so she’ll stop following me around with that goddamned camera. Yeah, don’t look at your friend. He can’t help you here. Just do it.”

Here are Jaco and Candice looking sweet.

We rolled into LA for a day off before the Staples Center show. Now that oughta be interesting.

xok

When we got on the bus last night after the show we hung out with the guitar player Jaco’s family. Lovely people. The buses were situated in such a way that we were literally surround by fans so when Miley came out of the venue, everyone was able to see her walk to her bus which NEVER happens. I noticed that her management was milling about which again, never happens so I excused myself from our very nice hang, grabbed my camera and jumped for joy when this happened:

{vidavee id=”3205″ w=”320″ }

For me, this was like like Ahab and Moby Dick, I swear. No, that’s not right. It’s more like the Holy Grail. Hmm..no. I think I just like seeing people get what they want if they truly deserve it. Anyhoo, I LOVE it!!!

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The Oakland show was pretty cool. Miley’s Dad, Billy Ray Cyrus showed up to perform a duet with Miley and the band called “Ready, Set, Don’t Go”. Miley’s big sister Brandi sat in on acoustic guitar. Billy Ray reminds me so much of Johnny Damon, it’s kind of spooky.

We rolled out of Oakland and got to LA at around 5am. There are really no words to describe just how awesome it was to walk Zoe Mabel to school, listen to the final mixes of my record with Michael and check out Henry’s new Legos. The pièce de résistance of the day was sushi together at Katsu-ya.

henry and michael

zoemay and me

Then we went to our neighbors’ house for a playdate. The nature of an evening playdate at the Pisarik’s is best summed up like this:

Lots of wine and lots of kiddos. Zoemay read Simone her bedtime story while Courtney, Michael, Michael and I polished off a bottle of Chassagne Montrachet.

It was a perfect day off. Back to work for me.

xok

Last night’s show was in Portland and was arguably our best. Everything seems to be loosening up considerably on stage as the playing and singing becomes more reflexive. Even the *ahem* choreography that is part of my job is coming along nicely. Oh. My. God. At some point on this tour, there are going to be people in the audience that I actually know and they are going to witness me shaking my ass with the dancers. I’m not sure if this is thrilling or tragic. Maybe it’s a bit of both.

It has become a ritual to come back to the bus after the show and go investigate the phalanx of fans that waits behind barricades, hoping for a glimpse of Miley. Or at least someone who may have glimpsed Miley earlier that day, such as myself. Sometimes I’ll tell them I am her butler or dog walker and then take their picture:

I cannot believe the amount of people who wait every night and are happy to do so knowing that Miley will not be making an appearance. It’s so hopeful a gesture that it almost makes me want to cry.

Long drive overnight from Portland to San Francisco, where we have a day off before the Oakland show. I love this city.
Jaimie and I immediately hit the pavement for some sightseeing and ended up in Chinatown. For me, food is always the motivating factor in getting me to check out the cities we go to, so San Fran had me dizzy with the possibilities. As we walked, we saw stuff like this:

But our wandering aimlessly brought major dividends when we stumbled across an amazing Chinese restaurant. You can’t go there because I and Jamie have both forgotten the name but it was awesome, trust me. They fed us this:

And then the waiter took a picture. I am showing a heretofore uncharacteristic lack of vanity by posting this photo of myself, but if I am going to have a blog, I guess I have to suck it up.

I am going out to dinner with friends tonight but I will be thinking of Zoe Mabel and Hank dressed up as a witch and Spiderman respectively as they head out trick-or-treating. I hope I get some pix of that. I miss my babies like crazy.

xok

It’s 2:45am now…

Just rolled into Portland, Oregon. We are staying at a sweet hotel that is exactly as I have always imagined Irving’s Hotel New Hampshire would look like. Where are the bears and the WC? I am really tired.

When we arrived at soundcheck today, Miley and I realized that we had both bought the same exact Marc Jacobs coat at Barney’s on our day off. We are OG’s up in here.

Sleepy.

xok